Signs You're Dating a Person With Alcohol Use Disorder

Is your partner's drinking causing concern? Discover the signs you're dating a person with alcohol use disorder and find support.

Published On

March 24, 2024

Dove Recovery's Team

Signs You're Dating a Person With Alcohol Use Disorder

Signs of Alcohol Use Disorder in a Partner

If you suspect that your partner may be struggling with alcohol use disorder, it's important to be aware of the signs and symptoms. Understanding these signs can help you recognize the issue and take appropriate steps towards seeking help and support. Here are some common signs to look out for:

Unsafe Drinking Behaviors

One of the signs that you may be dating a person with alcohol use disorder is if your partner engages in unsafe drinking behaviors, such as drinking in situations where it's unsafe, such as when driving a car or operating machinery. This can lead to accidents and serious injuries.

Relationship Problems

Another significant sign of dating someone with alcohol use disorder is when you notice that your partner's drinking habits are causing relationship problems. This may manifest as arguments about the frequency of drinking or how much is consumed. Relationship strain and conflicts related to alcohol can have a negative impact on both partners and the overall relationship.

Interference with Responsibilities

People with alcohol use disorder may have difficulty fulfilling responsibilities at work, school, or home due to their drinking habits. This interference with daily activities can lead to negative consequences, such as poor job performance, academic difficulties, or neglecting household responsibilities.

Excessive Time Spent on Drinking

If your partner spends a significant amount of time drinking, obtaining alcohol, or recovering from its effects, it could be a strong indicator of alcohol use disorder. This excessive time devoted to drinking can have a detrimental impact on other areas of life, such as job responsibilities or social activities [1].

Withdrawal Symptoms

When someone with alcohol use disorder stops drinking or significantly reduces their alcohol intake, they may experience withdrawal symptoms. These symptoms can include nausea, sweating, shakiness, and anxiety, among others. The presence of withdrawal symptoms suggests physical dependence on alcohol.

Being aware of these signs can help you identify alcohol use disorder in your partner. It's important to approach the situation with empathy and understanding. If you suspect that your partner may be struggling with alcohol use disorder, encourage open communication and consider seeking professional assistance to address the issue effectively.

Understanding Alcohol Use Disorder

To effectively recognize and navigate a relationship with someone struggling with alcohol use disorder (AUD), it is important to develop an understanding of this condition. This section will provide insights into the prevalence of alcohol use disorder, its impact on relationships, behavioral and psychological signs, as well as the financial consequences associated with the disorder.

Prevalence of Alcohol Use Disorder

Alcohol use disorder affects a substantial number of individuals, with an estimated one in every 13 adults in the United States grappling with this condition, amounting to approximately 14 million people [2]. This prevalence highlights the significance of recognizing the signs and symptoms of AUD in a partner.

Impact on Relationships

Alcohol use disorder can significantly impact relationships. People with AUD often fail to meet their major life responsibilities at work, school, or home due to recurrent episodes of drinking, which is a clear indication that they are struggling with AUD. The strain caused by the disorder can lead to conflicts, decreased trust, and emotional turmoil within the relationship.

Behavioral and Psychological Signs

Understanding the behavioral and psychological signs of alcohol use disorder is crucial in identifying if your partner is struggling with AUD. These signs may include mood swings, irritability, and a tendency to pick fights over minor issues. Additionally, individuals with AUD may experience memory lapses, blackouts, or difficulty concentrating, which can impact their ability to function in day-to-day life and relationships.

Financial Consequences

Alcohol use disorder can also have significant financial consequences. Individuals struggling with AUD may face financial problems such as spending excessive money on alcohol, neglecting bills, or legal issues related to alcohol use. These financial challenges can contribute to increased stress and strain within the relationship, as well as impact the overall stability of the individual's life.

By understanding the prevalence of alcohol use disorder, its impact on relationships, the behavioral and psychological signs, as well as the financial consequences associated with this condition, you can better recognize and support a partner who may be struggling with AUD. It is important to seek professional assistance and provide a supportive environment for your partner to encourage their journey towards recovery and well-being.

Coping with a Partner with Alcohol Use Disorder

When dating someone with alcohol use disorder, it's essential to navigate the challenges with care and seek strategies for coping with the situation. Here are some key approaches to consider:

Setting Boundaries

Setting boundaries is crucial when dating a person with alcohol use disorder. Establishing clear, consistent, and enforceable boundaries is important to protect your own well-being and maintain a healthy relationship dynamic. By clearly communicating your limits and expectations, you establish a framework that promotes respect and safety for both parties involved. It's important to remember that boundaries should be firm but fair, focusing on your own needs and boundaries rather than attempting to control the other person's behavior.

Seeking Support

Dealing with a partner who has alcohol use disorder can be emotionally challenging. It's important to seek support from friends, family, or a therapist who can provide guidance and understanding. Support groups like Al-Anon can offer a safe space to share experiences, learn coping strategies, and receive encouragement from others who have faced similar situations. Engaging in therapy or counseling can also provide valuable insights and help you navigate the complexities of the relationship.

Avoiding Enabling Behaviors

Enabling behaviors can inadvertently perpetuate the cycle of alcohol use disorder and hinder the person from seeking help. It's crucial to avoid enabling behaviors, such as making excuses for their drinking or covering up their actions. Instead, encourage personal accountability and responsibility for their behavior. By refraining from enabling, you create an environment that supports their journey towards recovery and empowers them to seek the necessary help.

Encouraging Treatment

Recognizing the signs of alcohol use disorder in your partner is an important step, but it's equally essential to encourage them to seek professional help. Openly express your concerns and provide support in their journey towards recovery. Encourage them to explore treatment options such as therapy, counseling, or support groups specific to alcoholism. Approaching the topic with empathy and understanding can foster a sense of trust and motivate them to take steps towards a healthier lifestyle.

Coping with a partner who has alcohol use disorder can be emotionally challenging. It's important to remember that you are not alone and that seeking help and support is crucial for both yourself and your partner. By setting boundaries, seeking support, avoiding enabling behaviors, and encouraging treatment, you can navigate the complexities of the relationship and support your partner's journey towards recovery.

Recognizing Alcohol Use Disorder in a Partner

When dating someone, it's important to be aware of the signs that may indicate they have alcohol use disorder. Recognizing these signs can help you understand and address the challenges that may arise in the relationship. The signs of alcohol use disorder can be categorized into behavioral, physical, emotional, and interpersonal signs.

Behavioral Signs

Behavioral signs of alcohol use disorder in a partner may include:

Frequent excuses for drinking, such as using alcohol to relax, deal with stress, or feel normal.
Frequent episodes of drunkenness or blackouts, where the person is unable to recall events that occurred while intoxicated.
Neglecting responsibilities, such as work, family obligations, or personal commitments, due to excessive drinking.
Excessive time spent on drinking, with a significant portion of their time and energy focused on obtaining and consuming alcohol.
Experiencing withdrawal symptoms, such as tremors, irritability, or anxiety when attempting to cut down or stop drinking.

Physical Signs

Physical signs of alcohol use disorder in a partner can vary but may include:

Slurred speech, where the person's speech is unclear or difficult to understand.
Unsteady gait or impaired coordination, making it difficult for the person to walk or perform tasks that require balance.
Bloodshot eyes, where the person's eyes appear red or blood vessels in the eyes are enlarged.

Emotional Signs

Emotional signs of alcohol use disorder may manifest as:

Sudden mood changes, where the person's emotions fluctuate rapidly or they display unpredictable behavior.
Symptoms of depression or anxiety that seem unrelated to other life events, potentially indicating a psychological dependence on alcohol.

Interpersonal Signs

Interpersonal signs of alcohol use disorder in a partner can include:

Relationship issues stemming from the person's alcohol consumption, such as arguments, emotional distance, or a lack of trust.
Lying about alcohol consumption or attempting to hide their drinking habits from you.
Excessive drinking as a coping mechanism, leading to instability and unpredictability in the relationship [3].

Recognizing these signs is the first step in addressing alcohol use disorder in a partner. It's essential to approach the situation with empathy and understanding, while also taking care of your own well-being. Seeking professional help, setting boundaries, and encouraging your partner to seek treatment are crucial steps in navigating the challenges of dating someone with alcohol use disorder [3].

Seeking Help and Support

When you are dating a person with alcohol use disorder, it is essential to seek help and support for both your partner and yourself. Dealing with alcohol dependency can be challenging, and seeking professional assistance can provide valuable guidance and support. Here are three key avenues to consider when seeking help and support in this situation.

Professional Assistance

Seeking professional assistance is crucial when dating someone with alcohol use disorder. Professionals, such as therapists, counselors, or addiction specialists, can provide you with the necessary guidance and support to navigate the challenges you may face in your relationship. They can help you understand the nature of alcohol use disorder, provide strategies for coping, and offer appropriate treatment options for your partner.

It is recommended to reach out to the National Helpline of the Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration (SAMHSA). They can provide information on symptoms and signs of alcohol use disorder, along with treatment options for individuals or family members dealing with this issue.

Addressing the Relationship

Addressing the impact of alcohol use disorder on your relationship is crucial for the well-being of both you and your partner. Open and honest communication is essential. Express your concerns, feelings, and observations to your partner in a supportive and non-confrontational manner. Encourage them to seek professional help and express your willingness to support them throughout their journey to recovery.

Setting boundaries is also an important aspect of addressing the relationship. Establish clear expectations and limits regarding acceptable behavior and the consequences of continued unhealthy drinking patterns. Seek guidance from support groups like Al-Anon, which can provide valuable insights and encouragement for partners of individuals struggling with alcoholism.

Getting Guidance for Yourself

Caring for yourself is equally important when you are in a relationship with someone with alcohol use disorder. It can be emotionally draining and challenging to support your partner through their recovery. Seeking guidance for yourself, such as therapy or counseling, can help you navigate your emotions, establish healthy coping mechanisms, and gain the strength and resilience needed to support your partner effectively.

Remember, recognizing the signs of alcohol use disorder and seeking professional help for both yourself and your partner are crucial steps in addressing the challenges of dating someone with alcohol dependency. By seeking assistance and support, you can navigate these difficult circumstances and work towards a healthier and more fulfilling relationship with your partner.